Today

If I lay here
If I just lay here
Would you lay with me
And just forget the world

And the walls come a tumbling down....

Its been a long time since I wrote. I have been trying to aviod my real feelings by doing food reviews,and creating a political blog in my hometown. But you can't avoid the inevitable.

I'm home. At least that what it is supposed to be. I like my space. But it is so weird. I am alone. My sister is gone, my Natalie is gone, my husband is gone, my home is gone, my divorece is all but final, I am trying to create a new life with new routines, and a new home. Some days it is ok, some days I can't do it. I just cry. I feel lonely.

So i hide behind what ever is around. Somedays I feel like just downing myself in booze and pills.

Help me I am drowning.